Tad Bit of Panic

pan·ic¹

ˈpanik/

noun

1. 1.

   sudden uncontrollable fear or anxiety, often causing wildly unthinking behavior.

^

Well, the oxford is on point.

This post is written in pure panic caused due to sudden transition.

Reasons: 

1) I haven't posted all November. The minute I realized it was November 30 (Also, a very special day) I jumped wondering about how unfortunate my blog calendar will end up looking if it says November(0). However, Panic is irrational so it followed a million other thoughts. 

2) I'm graduating in 12 days. That's right! What happens next? I have it all figured out. 

JUST KIDDING. 

I have NO idea. Apart from the fact that I'm going home to a bunch of happy faces, I don't know. I may be teaching English in a part of India I can't pronounce (That would be nice) or I could have a fancy job in the Bay area (That would be ideal) 

3) Unknown gives peace. Half known gives stress and full known means trouble. I am hanging in the half known. After 22 years (I'm not letting it sink in that I'm very close to turning 23) I know what I really like to do. And I really really like to do it.  But its half known because even though I know what I want to do and I'm pretty damn good at it, I haven't quite figured out how to get there.

4) Financial Independence: That means something. I have suddenly reached this point in my life when I want to be responsible for everything I do and I want to take care of myself. (Mom and Dad, gifts are ALWAYS welcome) but I want to pay my bills on my own and I want to at least try saving something substantial.

5) The Job Hunt: There I said it! I was skeptical because at this point you could be a future employer reading it but hey! What’s there to hide? I have applied for tons of jobs, had several interviews but I just know about 3 that I would actually LOVE. Of course, this is what I think right now but December is a tough time because everyone is in the mood to be jolllaaaay and budgets are tight as the financial year is ending. Cherry on the cake? 97.8 % of Online resumes don't reach a human being. So, I am good, really good at what I do. But this wait is making me crazy, and the fact that a lot of my resumes don't reach a human being makes me hysterical. The known means trouble though because I know that I'm going to find a job, at a place that I love, and add immense value to where I am working. 

So yes those are my reasons to panic ^ Writing helps, Also November is not (0) anymore!

^That was a monologue. No judging  :) 

Miles to go before I sleep,

Juie